Shady
by bloodraven13
Summary: RavenRob. Raven is dating BB, Robin's dating Star, but is an inside relationship really worth the risk or pain? *COMPLETE*
1. 7:45AM

Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Titans

This is kinda odd, but I figured it worked. Thats why I wrote this anyway. Actually, I wrote it because of something that I don't really want to get involved in, but I got involved anyway... but this is it. You don't like it, too bad. Stop reading. If you do, I love you too.

Raven walked uneasily out of the bathroom, glancing ever so many steps to make sure no one was following. She gently rubbed herself and stumbled into her room onto her bed. She grabbed a pen and her notebook and flipped open to a page.

_Wednesday- 7:45AM Robin's Room_

She crossed out the date and wrote.

_I didn't feel ashamed, or embarrased. Not until he saw me. He didn't know about my pain down there, and that's probably my fault. I should've told him. But I didn't. _

_He let me in his room, while he was watching TV. I sat down and took off my shoes and cloak. He went inside his bathroom; I could hear him brushing his teeth. A few minutes later, I heard him start the shower. Thats when he came out and got me. _

_He was the first one naked between the two of us. I took in all his form and glory. Funny how hard he was before we were even together. I undressed slowly, one for effect, and two, because I didn't want him to see me. I didn't want him to see me down there. _

_I went into the shower with him and stood there as he fingered me. I moaned quietly. He didn't believe me when I told him a few days before I was a silent lover, I guess now he knew. I started to play with his lower self, gently tugging and pulling, and then he looked at me and said, "Do you want to suck it?" At first I thought he asked, "Do you want to fuck it?" So I answered yes. Thats when I realized what he meant. I got down on my knees anyway, telling him on the way down it was my first time sucking anyones dick. I don't recall if he said anything or not. _

_I sucked and sucked, trying to please him. I think it worked, because he didn't want me to stop, not until he was so hard he was going to bust in my mouth. I smiled, I think, when he lifted me up and fingered me again, with one, two and finally three fingers, to prepare me for his enterance. _

_He turned and put on a condom, and tried to fuck me right there in the shower. He was too big, and I wasn't wet enough. He still hadn't said anything about my lower parts. _

_We got out of the shower to move tothe couch in his room. I took so long in just getting dressed he told me to forget about it and just come out. As we sat on the couch he removed my clothes, leaving me in just my thong. He looked at me down there and smiled, I think. Yes. And thats when he began to give me my very first orgasm. _

_It didn't last long though, because he wanted to fuck me so badly. I was okay with it. He quickly put on his condom, and then began to pump in and out of me. It hurt, and I wanted to cry, but I didn't. I slowly choked it in, and tried to rock with him. He stopped a minute or so later. He couldn't move on. _

_He sat up and looked at me. How, I can't even tell. He looked somewhat scared. I know I was. He looked down at my lower extremities again and said, "I can't do it. I'm sorry. Starfire." I nodded and smiled at I sat up, re-adjusting my thong and then putting on my shirt, bra and pants. "Really, I am sorry." He said once more as he looked at me. "Don't sweat it," I said, lying through my teeth," I was feeling guilty too about Beastboy."_

_I know it was a lie. I hadn't thought about him the entire time I was in Robin's room, or even when I was walking towards his room. I didn't care if I hurt him. I didn't care. _

_He came back in, as I sat on the couch, and questioningly looked at me. "You ever had sex before?" I know what he meant. I didn't looklike a virgin down there, even though I was. I was molested several times in my childhood by 3 men or so, though all not at the same time. I was never penatrated, so it wasn't rape.It was on Azurath. I was going to tell him I was molested, figured he wanted to know, but the wrong word popped out. Rape. _

_I know it was the wrong word, but it was still the same sense.They allrapped me of my first touch, my first innocence. So in the sense, it was the right word. I think. _

_"You're talking about down there," I said as I encircled myarea with my hand, and he nodded, " I was raped when I was younger. Thats why." His face dropped as soon as I said it. "Oh. I'm sorry. Really. I am so sorry." I blew it off as nothing, and acted like I was over it. He didn't realize I was still hurting from it. _

_I think he said something about me being a virgin, yet not. And that I should explain to Beastboy what happened to me so he didn't freak out the first time we made love. I thought, 'Why the fuck should it matter? You would have made me unpure anyway.' I left his room, pretending I was okay, but the thought remained in the back of my head. What the fuck is wrong with me?_

_I need help. I need to meditate. No I don't. I need to talk to someone about this. I better not . Maybe I should talk to Robin more about this? No. No. _

_Raven_

Raven shut her journal and flung it off into her closet, only so she wouldn't dwell on the fact any longer that she did fuck Robin, though neither reached their peak, and that she did tell him that she was 'raped' when she was younger. It was a bad morning to say the least.

She walked out of her room to be smacked into Cyborg, who was just about to knock on her door. She stumbled back, caught herself and glared at Cyborg. "What the fuck do you want?" she said as she growled, holding her head. He put his hands up in defense and smiled, "Nothin'! Honestly! BB just put an APB out on you because it's almost noon and no one's seen you. You okay?" She shook her shoulders and said, "I've been better." She brushed past him and down the hall towards the commons.

Beastboy saw her and jumped up into her. "OH MY GOD YOU'RE OKAY!" He said as he hugged her and kissedher forhead. She moved back and laughed. "Ummm yeah." "Where were you this morning?" he asked as he put his hands around her waist. She quickly glanced over to Robin, who didn't return the gesture. "No where. Just... trying to find myself."


	2. Aftermath

Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Titans, only this story.

I didn't know if anyone wanted me to continue this, or follow it up, but incase they did, here it goes. I'd like to know if you guys would like me to continue it, because if you do, I will. Well, review please. Oh, and super super sorry for this wait. I swear. I didn't think it'd take this long to get back on my computer!

Raven embraced Beastboy's hug lovingly, but gently pushed him away. "I'm kind of tired right now Beastboy, easeup." She said as she slowly sat on the couch next to Robin.

"Hey Raven! How was your morning?" Robin asked as he smiled.

Raven wasn't sure how to react. What was she supposed to say to the boy who stole her virginity, but was unsure about the whole thing? She parted her lips slightly, frowned and then answered.

"Well, it wasn't a complete loss I guess."

Beastboy quickly jumped the couch to land at her side. "What made it a semi-loss Rae?" Raven caught his hand on her lap and squeezed it. She wasn't sure what she should say. How would she explain herself? Easy. She wouldn't have too. Robin explained it for her.

"Couldn't find your tranquillity spot while you meditated?" He asked as he skillfilly poked her side. She turned to look at him as if he was stupid, and as if to say, 'Are you fucking serious!' and then she realized he was covering up for her, so she wouldn't have to lie so much. "Yeah. I couldn't concentrate."

Beastboy hugged her once more before he jumped off the couch. "Would you care for some waffles Raven?" She nodded as she shifted uneasily under her seat. As she moved she could feel Robin's hand touch her side again, this time rubbing.

By now all the titan's except for Robin, Raven and Beastboy were in the room. Starfire had left for the mall and Cyborg left to escort her. Robin was supposed to be scanning the city with Raven and Beastboy was... well... anyway, everyone was gone basically.

Beastboy was well at work in the kitchen before he cried out. "OH MY DEAR SWEET JESUS! WE'RE OUT OF WAFFLE MIX!" He ran quickly into the main room. "Raven... would you care for some tofu waffles, since we're out of regular mix?" Raven mentally screamed, "NO!" but just made a nasty face. "No. I'm fine." Beastboy scratched his head and thought, "How about I run downtown and get some for you?" Raven made another face and said, "I'll be fine Beastboy, really." Robin interuppted them though and said, "You should run downtown. Take the list with you. It's on the fridge. Raven needs this food. NEEDS IT!" and at the last statement he smacked her stomach.

Beastboy smiled and said, "No worry. I'll be back in twenty okay?" And with that he ran out the room.

Robin smirked as he looked at Raven once again.

"Why do you insist on us being alone Robin? Wasn't I with you already?" Raven said as she smacked Robin in the chest."Well, I figure this, it wasn't like what we were doing was right, yet on the other hand, how I did you was wrong. So I guess what I want to say, is that I wanted to repay you for what I did." And with that Robin hugged Raven, this time genuinly.

Raven didn't return the hug, but gently pushed him away. "What do you mean "repay" for what you did?" Robin smirked again, and then picked Raven up from the couch, setting her on the floor. "Follow me, and I will show you." And with that he walked out of the room.

Raven grabbed her side and then mentally kicked herself for letting him convince Beastboy to leave. "Why do I let him do this to me?" She walked out of the room then, to find the boy blunder.

She found him sitting in the pool on the third story of the building. He was wearing his trunks and his mask. He playfully splashed water, but she dodged it with her telekinesis. "Sit down Raven, please." Robin said as he patted the ledge next to the water. Raven attempted to read the look on his face but instead of pussy-footing around him she just asked the one question that had been bugging her since that morning. "Why do you want to fuck with me?" Robin smiled seductively and licked his lips, "Well Rae, you're a very beautiful girl and..." "No, not fuck me, fuck with my head. Fuck me stupid in the mind? Play me! Whatever word you were thinking of!" Robin could feel the anger leaking off Raven as she stared him down and he carefully choose his words.

"Raven, you're beautiful, you should know that. Now sit down and let me explain myself." This time instead of patting the spot next to him he gentlypulled her arm down.The tears in Raven's eyes were swelling up andsoftly rolling down the side of her face. "Well, why?" She asked as she tried her hardest to stop the rivers flow on her cheeks.

"Raven, I thought you were beautiful from the moment I saw you enter the Titans Tower." And with that he placed his hand on her cheek. "It's like I loved you from day one, but neither of us said anything. Sure, I liked Starfire, but not like I loved you. She jumped to go out with me, but not you. You haven't said anything about love to me, not until three weeks ago. I've been dating Star for almost 6 months, and you've been dating BB for almost a month and a half. I know you like you were my sister, but I love you more than that. I love Starfire, and BB's my friend and I don't want to see him get hurt, so it was hard for me to do what we did. It's why I had to stop."

He gently slid himself in the water and grabbed Ravens sides. He didn't pull her in, but he just looked at her in the eyes.

"Raven, I know you felt something for Beastboy, thats why we both stopped. Both of us don't want to hurt our others, but we know we want eachother. So that's why I've realized we have to stop, but not until I repay you for every great deed you've done for me."

And with that he leaned up and kissed her on the lips, quickly asking for entrance. Raven could feel the passion from his words, and the emotions on his lips as he did this. She easily allowed him entrance inside her mouth and kissed him sweetly. She could feel his right hand sliding up her suit, but she didn't care, she wanted to feel his touch again. She needed to feel his warmth inside her.

His hand rubbed her clit through her suit, but soon found his way inside, gently rubbing and fingering her delicate flower. She lightly moaned as he did this, and found it more convienent for him if she spread her legs. He continued his menstrations. Soon his kisses fell down her lips to her chin, to her neck, to her chest, and then finally, after moving the suit asside, her flower. He gently licked her clit and began to eat his meal. Every drop of gold from Raven was being engulfed by Robin's eager lips. Raven could feel her hands meshed in his hair, pushing his head further and further into her legs. His tongue rubbed and sucked upon Raven's clit as his fingers continued to work inside of her. He could feel her getting close; she had become more quiet and he could feel her hands push him downward and then finally, she shook. She came with such a passion, with such a fury, that Robin had to control himself not to stick his dick inside of her.

She laid there, with her legs in the water, and her back on the ground, gasping for breath. He had given her an orgasm. And it felt wonderful.

Raven wandered out of the room without Robin and up to her room, she had to meditate.

Raven ended up in all actuallity in the shower washing away the filth she created. She was impure, Robin made her impure. She didn't even hear the door close as she washed herself. She didn't even hear the curtain fall back. She did feel the hands wrap around her waist. And she felt the hot breath around her neck, and then the words, "I love you Raven."


	3. Guilt

**SHADY PART: III  
BY BLOODRAVEN13**

Truly, I must apologize, first and foremost. I do understand it has been roughly, give or take, 2 years. I can't really give a good explaination on this, but I will apologize for it. I do have intentions on continuing this because I've really really been wanting too, and I know that I do have fans out there that do want to see this thing through. So if I'm not doing this for you, I'm doing it for them.

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TEEN TITANS. I ONLY OWN THIS PLOT.**

* * *

She laid there, with her legs in the water, and her back on the ground, gasping for breath. He had given her an orgasm. And it felt wonderful.

Raven wandered out of the room without Robin and up to her room, she had to meditate.

Raven ended up in all actuallity in the shower washing away the filth she created. She was impure, Robin made her impure. She didn't even hear the door close as she washed herself. She didn't even hear the curtain fall back. She did feel the hands wrap around her waist. And she felt the hot breath around her neck, and then the words, "I love you Raven."

She turned around and quickly shoved the masked wonder into the tiles on the wall and proceeded to move her fingers and wrap them around his throat. "I never, ever, EVER, want to see or hear your voice again!" and she shoved him to the ground. He reached up to grab her, but only succeeded in grabbing air. "Raven, it's not what you think." _It's not what I think?_ Raven thought to herself. "ITS NOT WHAT I THINK?!" She screamed at Robin as she turned around. She could feel the black aura encircling her, and she could feel the fear on him as she stepped towards him. "Do you want to know what I think exactly?" Robin gulped his breath and nodded his head; now what not the time to tell her what she thought.

"I think, wonderboy, that you did this shit intentionally. I think you intentionally wanted to get me all hot and bothered with you. I think you wanted to take what was precious of mine, and litterally, quite litterally, throw it back in my face like it wasn't any good to you." Raven stopped to take a breath, and this is when Robin came into play, "Now Rae, I didn't do it like that. I wasn't trying to hurt you," "BULLSHIT! Like I said, you were in it for you. You wanted to take my virginity and shove it back in my face like, Oh no, I can't 'cause I love Star and you love B." Now Robin was getting frustrated. He just wanted to say his piece so she would understand what happened. "No, Raven, it wasn't like that. It was just I had second doubts." "Oh, so suddenly I'm no fucking good right? What is it? Hmmm? What? Am I tainted meat?" "No! It's nothing like that! It just seemed to feel bad." Raven took a breath and eyed him evilly. "So it is that? I'm fucking tainted, used, or whatever, and it's all fucked up for you. Well so fucking bad!" Robin stood up defensively, "Now I have said three God Damn times already that it is not," "Yeah, I'm no fucking good to you! It was touched once, take it back! Right?" Now Robin was getting real pissed. "You know what, you know what?! Yeah, it is that! I asked for grade A steak and what did I get, ground fuckin beef! Hell yeah you're tainted!"

Raven's aura disappeared, and she fell to the ground infront of him. "What?" She said as she chocked back tears. "No! No! Rae, Raven! I didn't mean it, I..." She just pointed to the door. "Please, you've already said how you feel. Just go." And with this she did start to cry. Even though she knew he didn't mean it, she felt like he did. He started to speak, but was just so upset with what happened he just picked up his clothes and left. If she wanted to be alone, she could be.

* * *

She fumbled with her clothes as she waited for Beastboy to return. Robin hadn't called her to help with the city, and she probably wouldn't have bothered to help if he had asked. She didn't know what to do.

Raven got up and fell onto her bed, exasperated. "God, what have I done?"

True, she did have feelings for both Robin and Beastboy when all this started a few months ago, and yeah, she did like Beastboy, it's just her and Robin had so much in common and so much already used time together that it only felt right when she would talk to him over the most intimate details of herself. It seemed like it started so long ago when Robin was asking her about Beastboy and how she felt about him after they decided to start officially dating. He started by asking her what she liked and what he liked and how much she liked him, so its only natural that they moved onto the more intimate details. He was trying to be tactful when he asked her, but he just sorta asked. "Do you shave?" and when he got the response "Shave what?" he knew he had her.

It had continued for weeks and weeks and had built up. This relentless secret chatting over her and how she liked people and how she liked things escalated and escalated until on night one week ago Robin hit her up on her cell phone with a text message.

"Do u luv BB"-Robin  
She knew then that no she didn't. He was great as a friend, but slowly, and because of Robin, she didn't want him.  
"No. U luv Star"-Raven  
"No. But we got sumthin."-Robin  
Raven's heart sank a little. "give me n bb sum time n we'll b good"-Raven  
She lied through her teeth. She, at this point in time, didn't want to love him at all, and honestly had no intentions of ever loving him more than she did now.  
"Y u ask"-Raven  
"Do u thnk we got sumthin"-Robin  
Ravens heart weirdly skipped a beat at this question "I would thnk so after we've been thru so much"-Raven  
"Do u luv me" -Robin  
"Yes"-Raven  
"Would u want 2 make luv 2 me"-Robin  
Raven stopped. She wasn't sure exactly what to say. If she says no, her heart sinks, and yes, she's left unsure. "I thnk so. Do u luv me"-Raven  
"Yes. After so long, of course i do. do u want to?" - Robin  
"Do what?"-Raven  
"Make luv"-Robin  
"yes"-Raven  
"meet me in my room, wed 7:30am"-Robin

And honestly, thats how it went down. Simple text messages escalating to the point of no return.

Raven laid there, recounting the steps to this level of defeat and agony, and just mulled over it. How would she explain herself? How could she ever face Beastboy again or even Robin? How could she do anything? Eventually all these thoughts bubbled inside Raven until all she could do was cry, and eventually this led her to a deep sleep that exploded nightmares in her head and a sorrow in her sould that she could not lift.

She slept for hours, long after Beastboy came in to wake her, and long after the Titans dispersed to their own neck of the Tower, and long after the man that truly loved her slept outside her door, waiting for an answer.

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Dun dun dun... yeah, sorry for the theatrics but i need to end here, only just so its an appropriate place. Let me know what u think. I am going to finish this with or without reviews, but reviews are still nice. See ya'll in a couple days when I update.

bloodraven


	4. Conclusion

**SHADY PART: III  
BY BLOODRAVEN13**

Like I said before, I'm continuing this.

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TEEN TITANS. I ONLY OWN THIS PLOT.**

* * *

"meet me in my room, wed 7:30am"-Robin

And honestly, thats how it went down. Simple text messages escalating to the point of no return.

Raven laid there, recounting the steps to this level of defeat and agony, and just mulled over it. How would she explain herself? How could she ever face Beastboy again or even Robin? How could she do anything? Eventually all these thoughts bubbled inside Raven until all she could do was cry, and eventually this led her to a deep sleep that exploded nightmares in her head and a sorrow in her sould that she could not lift.

She slept for hours, long after Beastboy came in to wake her, and long after the Titans dispersed to their own neck of the Tower, and long after the man that truly loved her slept outside her door, waiting for an answer.

Days and weeks passed by without neither boy wonder or dark beauty speaking a word to one another. No one noticed this though, they just attributed this silence to intense planning on Robins part, and intense meditation on Ravens.

Beastboy and Raven stayed boyfriend and girlfriend, even though Raven's depression drove BB to a point that he himself wanted to be done with the whole situation, but because of his need for her love, and his love for her, he stayed. He spent days after days with her; laying across her bed, running his fingers through her hair, and telling her how much she was loved by him. Raven, on the otherhand, was still so upset with Robin, and the whole issue they had together, that she just couldn't bring herself to tell BB that she loved him at all. She did, however, notice this kindle that was started by him, and she acknowledged that if it wasn't his persistance and his whole heartedness thrown into this relationship, she wouldn't have even been here with him this long.

Monthes passed after the incident when Beastboy and Raven decided that it was time to move their relationship forward, to indulge in life's grand mysteries of the body. Raven felt more love for him, as he was the only one in the tower that seemed to love her. True, there was still Star, and Cyborg, but she had, after the incident, intentionally spaced herself from the two. Star, for obvious reasons, and Cyborg for the fact that he seemed to not like her as much as he did before the incident occured between her and Robin. She imagined that Robin had told Cyborg, or at least to some degree, informed him of her misdeeds against the green changling. Whether or not he believed him was yet to be seen.

Star and Robin, at this point had completely stopped dating. They had had their piece with eachother, but after Robin was caught cheating on Star with another girl it was considered over. She still cared for the boy blunder, but when it came down to it, her love for him didn't outweigh the pain he put in her heart when he did that. Raven was afraid that Robin had informed Star of what had gone down between them, but in the end it was truly just Robin getting caught with some other girl.

True, Raven just figured it was her, until Star came into her room that day, telling her about how she caught them at the mall, and how Robin denied her as his lover. Raven calmed her, and spoke kind words, but when it came down to it, she could not continue her relationship with Star as a friend. It wasn't that it was because she didn't like Star, or was afraid that Robin would say something, but it was because she knew that she had damaged their friendship. Raven knew that no matter what people may think, years of love can easily be destroyed by a few sentences and a couple seconds of your time.

In the end, however, the Titans remained Titans. They eventually moved out of the tower together, but still fought with eachother when danger arose.

Not too much longer after Robin turned 18, he joined the US Military and quickly became a SEAL. He married a woman in Iran, and they have two healthy baby boys that travel with them from base to base.

Cyborg, sadly, terminated his own life systems after a problematic depression that seemed to worsen after all the Titans left the Tower. He lived for about 2 hours after, and even though the paramedics tried to save him, he just wanted to go.

Raven and Beastboy, while in the Tower, fell in love and moved forward in eachothers lives. They were the first to move out of the Tower. Raven, being older, put the apartment in her name, and they've been in love ever since. No, Raven never did tell BB what she done, partly out of shame, but mostly because she loved him so much she couldn't stand to see him hurt. The two eventually went to college; BB becoming a vet, and Raven a world known chemist. A few monthes after Raven won the Nobel Prize, around her 22nd birthday, she became pregnant with BB's child. They are expecting December 3rd.

Star eventually returned to Tamarainia and was crowned queen when she turned 21. Last the Titans heard, she was expecting a "Bundle of the Joy" variety, as Star herself put it.

So as we see, the Titans era draws to a close here. The once great defenders of the city are now nothing more than extra ordinary individuals, but because of their courageous efforts, and valient crime fighting, they've set the pace for some new, better, crime stoppers.

THE END

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Dun dun dun... yeah, sorry for the theatrics but i need to end here, only just so its an appropriate place. Let me know what u think, reviews are still nice. I'm sorry though if this is how u didn't imagine it ending, but when it comes down to it, I felt it was necessary. I had ideas to keep it going, but then the story was lost, and so was the true meaning behind it.

Thank you so much for all of you that have supported me and will continue to support me and my work. Without u, there is no audience, and without an audience, there is no muse to give me my cue.

bloodraven


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